Next WordPress Generation

What kind of blogger will be your child (7 diagnoses)

I’m not supposed to tell you that being a blogger is as popular now as breathing and walking. Nowadays, the most common answer to every question: “I am a blogger”.

– “What’s your hobby?” – “I am a blogger”

– “Have you found a job?” – “I am a blogger”

– “What do you do on the weekend?” – “I am a blogger”

– “Why have you forgotten to take your child out of kindergarten?” – “I am a blogger”

And I don’t want to alarm you, but this blogging fate will most likely befall some of your children, almost all your grandchildren and all your great-grandchildren.

How to determine what kind of blogger will be your kid? Time will fly by very quickly, and you will notice before you know it that your son’s posts receive more likes than yours, and though you have been in the “profession” for many years, his followers click “Reblog” much more readily than yours, considering the fact that he hasn’t even turned seven.

Now is no time to think of it.

1) If your child sewed clothes for all her dolls, and in shades of tiny dresses and blouses you recognized your favorite skirt suit, don’t despair, your daughter will probably be a Fashion-blogger, and no matter how often you present chess and Monopoly to her, she will never turn off this fashionable and slippery track.

2) If your child’s blue pajama has become crystal-white after you’ve baked pancakes for breakfast, and this event strangely coincided with disappearance of flour from the kitchen, don’t worry, your child just may become a Food-blogger. And you will become a mother (or father) of Food-blogger.

3)  If on the way from kindergarten you’ve learned that Jessica’s dad is a truck driver, John’s mother has got a new car, and Jack peed his pants during naptime, just calm down and get ready, you’ll have to learn a lot of things later, one of those things is that your child will become a News-blogger.

4) If your child with sniper’s attention keeps a close watch on how you repair your bike in the garage, and the other day he took apart his bubble gun, and put back together a newer version of the AK with effective range up to 300 meters, never fear. Probably, your child will become a Digital-blogger, and you will become a new iPhone owner every time before its developers will do.

5) If you can’t remember your boss’s name but you remember names of 100 Greatest Cartoon Characters of all Time, and to the question “What’s your favorite toy? Tiger or teddy bear?” your child answers without any delay “remote control”, congratulations! You were nominated for Oscars 2016 for Better Parent for your role as better parent of a Movie-blogger!

6) If your dog’s food turned into anti-aging wrinkle cream, and your new lipstick transformed into magic weight-loss cure, don’t be nervous. Your little girl will become a Beauty-blogger, and you will become even younger than before you gave birth to her.

7) If your child dug a shelter from the mad world in the sandbox, and he doesn’t care about the number of chocolate sweets he could get for the winning a contest “Say cock-a-doodle-doo as loudly as you can”, I congratulate you. Your child is healthy. He will not be a blogger.

Advertisements

9 thoughts on “Next WordPress Generation

  1. OMG! My girls did that! Now only Buddha and their 10,000 friends know what they are putting out there on the internet with the smart phones I gave them so they could post pictures of all the things they did that I told them to never do.

    -And I wanted to warn you that I mention you in my nomination for the Blog Tour award and tell my three readers that my inspiration came from you. I hope this isn’t bad news, but I nominated you too. The Award announcement will post Sunday at 6:00 pm U.S.central time and the Flash Fiction, The Taste of Ice and Fire will post Monday 13 April at 5:00 am U.S. central time. If you are offended please tell me so I can delete it before my three readers find out I’ve spammed them again. (www.hyperionsturm.wordpress.com in case you forgot or deleted the spam in your inbox) 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • To tell the truth, I have not heard of this award before 😦 Thank you for giving me this information, I feel a little uncomfortable and even a little ashamed of not knowing about it 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Well..That is two of us because until one of my readers told me, I didn’t know about it either. The theme is the blogger’s creative process. My process is simple, chaos and the whispers from my head elves. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • I have only one, and he especially likes dictating me new post at night, but it’s similar to split personality disorder, so I’d rather write a post about it later =)

        Liked by 1 person

      • I know it will be a good one. I wait patiently in my chair that keeps me from falling out and bumping my head while punching the like button.

        Liked by 1 person

      • 🙂 Happens to me all the time. Sometimes I think those head elves are chimpanzees so much monkey business is going on all the time. It’s hard to keep up. 🙂 😉 :-O

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s